Yes! You have the right to direct access to as many families as you need to find exactly who you are looking for without pressure from anyone to choose a specific family. Your choice of families should not be dictated by the limited families available in the adoption professional’s immediate network. When you’re looking at family profiles, look for the Home Study Approved badge…this will let you know that a family has completed their home study by a licensed, ethical professional. A Home Study lets you know that the family you choose has completed extensive education, undergone rigorous background checks, participated in an interview process and had their home personally evaluated by a licensed professional.

When talking with adopting families on PairTree, be sure they know you need help. Financial assistance is a normal part of the process, and is regulated by State law. The law allows for assistance to pay for things like: pregnancy related expenses, living expenses while you’re pregnant, medical needs and counseling. The adopting family can put you in touch with their attorney or agency to start the process.

If you do not already have health insurance, you may qualify for Medicaid. An adoption service professional (like an attorney, social worker or agency) should be able to help you secure coverage, whether you ultimately decide to place or not.

You can choose how much contact, if any, you would like to have with your child and his or her adoptive parents. The more honest and direct your relationship is with the adopting parents, the more flexibility you’ll have in this decision. Maybe you want to be very involved from the start, maybe you don’t know how much involvement you want, but want the option to decide later… the more honest you are about your feelings with the adopting parents, the better. To learn more about open adoption, check this out.

Part of your adoption plan will be to create a Hospital Plan. This will outline who you want at the hospital with you, how much time you want to spend with your baby in the hospital, who you want in the delivery room with you and even your baby’s name. It is completely up to you to decide who you want in the room with you during delivery and during your hospital stay. You can decide if the adoptive parents you have chosen can be at the hospital, or if you want that time for yourself. To learn more about a Birth Mother’s perspective on the hospital experience, check out this article.

Tell the adopting parents you are connecting with right away. Their adoption agency or attorney must try their best to locate the expectant father and inform him of his rights. Expectant fathers’ rights vary from state to state. In some states the father may be required to be involved within a certain time frame to have parental rights and parent his child. If the expectant father supports the adoption and wants to be involved, he has a right to receive the same counseling and support as the expectant mother.