National Adoption Awareness Month: What is It and How Should You Celebrate?

Origin & History

What we now know as National Adoption Month, or National Adoption Awareness Month, began in Massachusetts in 1976 as Adoption Week. Governor Michael Dukakis proclaimed Adoption Week as a way to “promote awareness of the need for adoptive families for children in foster care.”

Fun fact - the first law in the US regarding adoption was passed in Massachusetts in 1851 (The Adoption of Children Act) and the first law requiring home studies for adoptive parents was also passed in MA in 1917.

In 1984 President Reagan, an adoptive father himself, announced he would be implementing National Adoption Week, to continue the mission of Governor Dukakis and raise awareness about the need for adoptive families for kids in foster care, emphasizing the adoption of children with special needs.

After seeing so many states celebrating Adoption Week, President Clinton expanded National Adoption Week to National Adoption Month in 1995. The purpose of NAAM was to raise awareness regarding the importance of finding permanent homes for children and youth in foster care. Many cities and states began hosting adoption events throughout the country to help children in foster care find permanent homes before the holiday season.

In 2000, President Clinton directed the Department of Health & Human Services to begin using the internet as a tool to help find homes for waiting children in foster care.

“As Hillary said, there are 100,000 children, just like those whom we clapped for today, in foster care still waiting for permanent adoptive homes. The Internet holds the potential to shorten their wait, to make an on-line link between foster care centers and families looking to adopt. Some states and private partners already are forging these connections, bringing together families in Alaska and children as far away as Pennsylvania, for example…Technology has given us an important tool and we should use it.”

According to Child Welfare Information Gateway, as of September 30, 2021, there were 114,000 children and youth waiting to be adopted who were at risk of aging out of foster care without permanent family connections.

• More than one in five children waiting for adoption are aged 13-17
• The average age of all children waiting to be adopted was 7.5 years old.
• The average time in care for all children waiting to be adopted was 33.7 months.
• The average time in care for children waiting to be adopted after termination of parental rights is 19 months.

Over the last 20 years, adoption agencies have used NAAM to promote domestic infant adoption as well, even though that was not the original intention. The origin of National Adoption Month was to find families for children…not to find babies for families.

With a staggering average of 75 prospective adoptive families for every 1 infant placed for adoption in the US, there is no lack of awareness of domestic infant adoption.

National Adoption Day

In 1999, National Adoption Day was launched by a coalition of supporters, including the Dave Thomas Foundation for Adoption, The Alliance for Children’s Rights, Congressional Coalition on Adoption Institute, and Children’s Action Network. National Adoption Day is a grassroots effort to raise awareness for the more than 113,000 children waiting to be adopted from foster care in the United States.

Across the country, courthouses and family organizations in more than 400 communities across the country have organized National Adoption Day events to finalize and celebrate adoptions from foster care. Since 1999, National Adoption Day has celebrated the finalizations of more than 75,000 children moving from foster care to a permanent family.

World Adoption Day

In 2014, the team at AdoptTogether gathered and created the first-ever #WorldAdoptionDay. November 9, 2014 began a worldwide tradition with the purpose of celebrating family, raising awareness for adoption and raising funds to support families along their adoption journey.

Recognizing that most adoption stories begin in loss and heartache, #WorldAdoptionDay celebrates the growth and hope that adoption can bring. Each year on November 9th, thousands of people across the globe draw a smiley face on their hands and share their photos to social media to share their adoption story.

A Birth Mom's Perspective

As a birth mom, I love and hate National Adoption Awareness Month.

I love it because so many voices we don’t normally get to hear from, speak up and speak out.  Birth moms and adoptees get to be heard.  But I also hate it, because so many adoption agencies and adoptive parents use this month to put adoption on a pedestal and only share adoption through rose-colored glasses - and sometimes adoption isn’t all sunshine and rainbows.

I have two adoption stories - one is amazing and beautiful and I am so grateful for it, but the other just isn’t.  It is quiet, lonely and sad.  And it sucks sometimes.  But I have learned to take the good with the bad, and I’ve learned what I need to do to stay afloat.

NAAM is a difficult month for birth moms, even for those with the best of adoption relationships.  It is hard to see happy adoption stories in your face, on your news feed, in your stories - all day every day.

To all my fellow birth moms: make sure to take care of yourself this month. Don’t be afraid to take a break.  Take a break from Facebook and Instagram, and other social media. Unfollow some of the adoption accounts you might follow.  Pick a new book to read this month, get a journal, take up knitting.  Give yourself a break. Don’t be afraid to say no. Say no to the visit.  Say no to going out with friends.  Say no to your family.  Do what’s best for you this month.  Take some ‘you’ time - you deserve it! But most importantly, show up.  Show up to support groups, to a meeting, to therapy.  Show up for yourself and for your mental health.  Don’t be afraid to ask for help if you need it.

To adoptive parents: don’t be surprised if your kiddo’s birth moms seem quiet this month. November can be an adoption overload for a lot of birth families, and sometimes we just need some peace and quiet. Just give them some grace and space to process their own feelings and emotions this month.

Flip the Script

Notably missing from the adoption celebrations taking place across the nation were the voices of birth parents and adoptees. Adoption agencies and adoptive parents were in control of the narrative of what adoption means, and what it looks like.

In November of 2014, Rosita Gonzalez of Lost Daughters began a Twitter hashtag movement to #flipthescript on National Adoption Awareness Month. The goal was simple - for adult adoptees voices to be represented during National Adoption Month. Adoptive parents and adoption professionals are overwhelmingly represented during NAAM, with adoptee voices, stories, and perspectives often silenced.

The #flipthescript movement was meant to give adoptees a platform to share their stories and voices…and share they did! In its first year, #flipthescript was used more than 18,000 times.

So…Do We Celebrate NAAM?

It’s important to recognize that not all members of the adoption community celebrate National Adoption Awareness Month. While it is often a time for adoption professionals and adoptive parents to celebrate the beauty of adoption, it is often met with feelings of loss and sadness by birth parents and adoptees.

Stephanie Drenka, an adult adoptee, shares in an article ‘I’m Adopted, But I Won’t Be Celebrating National Adoption Month,’

It’s okay to celebrate your adoption story all year long…from NAAM to birthdays to adoption days. While you’re celebrating, be sure to also take the time to listen to adoptee and birth parent perspectives.

National Adoption Day, Week and Month were created to find permanent homes for children in foster care. It is crucial to continue to raise awareness for the over 100,000 children awaiting permanency, over 400,000 children currently in foster care, and the teens who are in danger of aging out of the foster care system.

However, while we celebrate the families that have been formed through adoption, we recognize that adoption begins from loss, and we remember the parents, families, and children who struggle with that loss, and we hope for permanency for the kids still waiting.