Mary

& Micah

Home Study

Home study approvedApproved
Photograph of adoptive Family

Mary

Caregiver

Gender:

Female

Status:

Home study has been approved

State:

Oregon

Religion:

Spiritual

Education:

Some College

Profession:

Receptionist at Montessori school

Political Affiliation:

Prefer not to say

Micah

Hero

Gender:

Male

Status:

Home study has been approved

State:

Oregon

Religion:

Christianity

Education:

Bachelor’s Degree

Profession:

Senior Software Engineer

Political Affiliation:

Prefer not to say

We are the best choice because…

We will provide a stable, caring, and joyful life for a child and have the ability to seek out any resources or help that one may need or want in the future. Our daughter is very excited about the opportunity to have a sibling and she has shown such a tender side in guiding other young children at her school environment. We understand how to tackle the challenges that life can bring and move forward together.

-Mary

Complete the sentence, “I can’t live without……”

Having dinner together as a family, our family calendar, coffee, spending time at home with our pets, our supportive school for our daughter

-Mary

Do I have kids? How do they feel about a sibling?

Our daughter is so excited about the idea of having a sibling! We have talked with her about it regularly and borrowed library books to read with her about the imporance of being an older sister. We even got her a bunk bed for her room that transitions to other designs as she hopes to spend time with a younger sibling in there.

-Mary

What scares you?

Abandonment, loss of loved ones, vehicle crashes

-Mary

My favorite Instagram account is:

I like Janet Lasbury's instagram and she is the creator of the Respectful Parenting website. I also really enjoy Glennon Doyle's account and all of her books.

-Mary

My favorite YouTube video is: (paste the full link)

I'm trying not to look at youtube these days because our daughter saw all the things it can do and we don't her to go down a rabbit hole of intense screen time! Those unboxing videos are especially haunting for me as they are some form of late capitalist junk with people getting super excited about all the stuff they bought.

-Mary

I'm super competitive when it comes to...

I'm not a very competitive person, so this one is hard to describe for me. Don't we have enough competitive people in the world? That may sound lame, but gosh I've been around people before who get competitive about the silliest things!

-Mary

If you had to live on an RV or sailboat for the rest of your life, which would it be?

RV and we have a small camper now

-Micah

If I could have dinner with anyone—dead or alive—I would pick...

Maybe Joan of Arc or St. Francis of Assisi? There would be so much to learn from them!

-Mary

In five years our relationship with our child’s birth mother will…

Well in my ideal mind it would be a relationship where the birth mother is able to have some form of contact with their child based on what is best for them and for the family. I know other families who have adopted and every single one of their relationships looks so different! An example of one I think is rare, but very healthy is out lovely neighbor has a strong relationship with the birth mother for her oldest son and they get together regularly to chat. She even helped her out when she recovered from surgery last year. I think the best thing I could do is offer a safe place with stability for the birth mother to reach out to when it works for her life and offer regularly updates about their child. Anything additional to that I'd be happy to work with them on if it is what they would want at that point in their life.

-Mary

I hope our child’s birth mother is…

I wouldn't want a birth mother to feel she is being pressured into any decision to adopt or doesn't think she will ever have contact with their baby again (if that is what she feels is important). I want a birth mom to know that even if they lose contact with us for a period of time due to anything happening in their life that we can move forward with them together and to not feel they can't reach out.

-Mary

My best friend would describe me as...

Kind and helpful. I've been able to form some wonderful friendships with other parents in our neighborhood and we get together regularly for play dates.

-Mary

Three years from now, I hope our child’s birth mom is…

I hope they would be able to see how important offering a loving and stable home is for their child.

-Mary

What’s the first thing that comes to mind when you look at the night sky?

A sense of wonder and amazement, thinking of how precious life is. My first word was moon, so I have always been drawn to studying the night sky.

-Mary

Do you consider yourself religious or spiritual?

At this point in my life, I feel more towards the spiritual realm with enthusiasm that I continue to learn from so many people in my life of different faiths and backgrounds. It's really nice to learn more about the religions of the world. I'd say the way I love is my religion.

-Mary

My philosophy on parenting is...

Every day is a new day with parenting. There are so many ups and downs with trying to provide a loving and nurturing environment, a way to shelter them from struggles of the world but also have them be aware of the problems that persist at a time that they are able to comprehend them. I grew up in a home where I never once doubted how much my parents loved me and I do feel that it made a huge difference.

-Mary

What is the best word to describe our family?

I feel we are very stable as a family unit. We've worked hard together to make that happen and it is something we are willing to put energy towards for any changes that could happen in the future.

-Mary

What scares you?

Not knowing the truth, lack of communication when verification needed

-Micah

Favorite season and why?

Winter to celebrate Christmas

-Micah

Complete the sentence, “I can’t live without……”

Computer, caffeine, access to routine

-Micah

The most special thing I own is...

My body as I get to make my own decisions about it! I strive to offer an environment of body positivity because I think that negative comments and images really hurt even the youngest of kids. I honor myself and my body which I hope inspires my daughter to do the same and for others to know that I will always respect their bodies and their consent.

-Mary

I would never...

Purposely try to hurt another. Yes there are times that I can reflect back and realize I could have handled myself better with my words or actions, but I feel that I want to provide the best care I can with others.

-Mary

My neighborhood is a good place to raise a family because…

I'm proud that our neighborhood offers more diversity than some other areas of the city we live in. When I say diversity, I mean in a variety of ways - different thoughts, cultures, economic status, religions, and age. I feel that is important for a child to experience so they can see how large the world really is and that we must work together with others who are different than who we are.

-Mary

My favorite website is (...not your Facebook page :)):

One of my favorites is thisiscolossal.com which gives informaton about interesting art projects that people have done around the world. I also like to look at National Geographic online because the photography is always excellent and they give background issues on things I don't always come across.

-Mary

If I could change one thing about the World, it would be...

For people to be more undestanding of each other. We live in a world that people are quick to divide themselves without getting to know it's quite healthy to listen to those who have very different opinions and views than our own. If we could do this, I feel that some of the other major problems that we face (income inequality, lack of healthcare, war, starvation, etc) could be worked on.

-Mary

If you had to live on an RV or sailboat for the rest of your life, which would it be?

Absolutely an RV and we even have a small travel trailer that we love using regularly! It has given us wonderful family memories and we hope to have even more opportunities to travel together in the future.

-Mary

My best friend would describe me as...

Honest and direct

-Micah

My favorite place in the World is...

The Redwoods National Park in California. The smell and sights there are like no other and it's so peaceful.

-Mary

Dogs or cats?

I do love both, but tend to lean towards dogs. We have two dogs and one cat who always give us lots of snuggles. I've found that our daughter is drawn to animals and has become very gentle in the way she approaches them.

-Mary

My favorite Instagram account is:

I don't like social media

-Micah

Favorite season and why?

I love living in an area that has all four seasons we can enjoy. I've lived in places that didn't offer that and it was trying to get through either very long cold or hot seasons. Right now I am fully embracing autumn and all the wonderful smells/comfort it brings.

-Mary

Dogs or cats?

Dogs

-Micah

My philosophy on parenting is...

Authoritative with tenderness

-Micah

I would never...

be able to give a big lie and continue that lie for years

-Micah

When we argue, what’s it about?

I can proudly say one area we used to argue about was financial issues and that is no longer an issue for us. We changed the way we communicate about money and use a budgeting software program together for all purchases we make. It's really helped us change our communication style together! Mostly I think that the small arguments we would have typically are around not communicating something that needs to be done with each other. Once we are able to sit down and say why an issue is important, we can work around it and see how we can move forward with acceptance.

-Mary

If you had to pick a famous person to play you in a movie, who would it be?

Well I'd have a hard time deciding that because I don't feel that there has been enough representation of people like me who were born with a cleft lip. Maybe Helena Bonhan Carter because she is a true free spirit?

-Mary

We are the best choice because…

Our stability as a family

-Micah

If I could choose one type of food to eat for the rest of my life, it would be:

Fresh fruit. I'm not a picky eater and the area we live in offers so many produce choices that it makes meal time quite nice.

-Mary